Someone's in the house. He's watching. He's creeping round, only you can't see him. He's watching you from the walls. He's right behind you now. Looking over your shoulder. He wants the remote control. He's a bad boy. He wants to watch bad movies. Bad bad Ronald...

Monday, August 2, 2010

REVIEW: Forget Me Not (2009)

Pretty Faces All In a Row!
Not really sure why I picked this movie up. Probably the cool cover. Or maybe it was the only new horror tile released that week. What ever it was -- Holy Calvin Klein!! I haven't seen so may pretty faces on my screen since The Osmond Brothers made their umpteenth appearance on the Andy Williams Show. I'm thinking of petitioning to have the title officially changed to The Abercrombie & Fitch Kids Meet the Cute Little Killer Girl.
As the plot goes (reading from the press release)... "It's graduation weekend, and Sandy Channing, the popular class president of her small-town high school, should be enjoying the time of her life. But when her friends start disappearing, Sandy discovers they have unwittingly awakened the vengeful spirit of a girl they wronged long ago. Fighting for her sanity, Sandy must unlock a dark secret from her own past before it's too late."
Makes you just wanna go straight out and see it, doesn't it? If you ask me, the guy who wrote this logline oughta put down the pen and start working the popcorn counter, instead. A better summery would be Final Destination meets It's a Wonderful Life. Seems more catchy, don't it?
Anyway... Apparently, there's a Fords Modeling Agency in this high school, and someone ain't too happy about it, because all the beautiful kids are getting snuffed out, one by one. On top of that, everyone is starting to forget that the kids even existed (Gasp! I wonder if their portfolios were all wiped out too!). It seems that the ghost of a little girl (Bella Thorne, rumored to be the next Twilight superstar-in-the-making) is still pretty pissed about a fatal prank that the models all played on her. I swear, some kids just can't handle a goddam joke these days!
With all her foxy friends disappearing, Sandy (played by Carly Schroeder, who is killing any buzz she registered with the amazing Mean Creek)
can't quite figure out why she doesn't have any friends to remember anymore. Not that they were anything but forgettable, vapid, fashion whoring, beautiful people anyway. but, for some reason, she has that nagging feeling that she's forgetting something. Most likely her go-sees, because she's too busy being chased around by her boggyfriends.

This is director Tyler Oliver's first time at the helm, and I can't say honestly that he did terrible. Can't say he did too good, either. He is, however, earnest. He clearly had his mind set on certain goals, which he achieved wholeheartedly -- that being having a movie with loads of gore FX (overloaded, actually, for a ghost story, if yer asking me), and having a cast of young ingenues who would make Larry Clark throb with envy. My advice to him, for his next flick, would be to forget-me-not the heavy FX and try and tell a decent story. Yeah, I know. Stories are for old people. Kids these days don't need story. They want girls and gore!!
Okay.... you win...


  1. Pretty average flick, nothing too special about it. I kinda thought the "monsters" looked quite good at first, but the more they showed them the more fake they seemed to look. The story was utter shit, I'll give you that. And they didn't even have the decency to show some boobage. Those bastards...